George Denis Patrick Carlin (May 12, 1937 – June 22, 2008) was an American comedian, actor, author and social critic. Carlin was noted for his black comedy and thoughts on politics, the English language, psychology, religion, and various taboo subjects. He is widely regarded as one of the most important and influential stand-up comedians.
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If churches want to play the game of politics let them pay admission like everyone else
The bigger they are the worse they smell.
Baseball is the only major sport that appears backward in a mirror
Dusting is a good example of the futility of trying to put things right. As soon as you dust the fact of your next dusting has already been established.
Comedy is a socially acceptable form of hostility and aggression. That is what comics do stand the world upside down.
I don't know what to do during a moment of silence. What do they expect of me? They don't say pray. Fuck 'em I'll pray if I want to. Hey! Pray!. I don't know what to do. Sometimes I have evil thoughts.
Writing books isn't a drastic departure from writing for the stage. I've always written in the long format five eight 10-minute pieces rather than one-liners so since writing books the process hasn't changed much. A piece in my live routine can end up as part of one of my HBO specials and it can also end up in one of the books.